5.13.2009

Conflict Resolution = Closure


Tuesday’s are the nights that Michael and I facilitate a couple’s call for the marriage ministry we’re involved in and it was a good call last night – a lot of great questions and issues that came up which got worked through during the 5 hours we were on (try getting that much time from your Christian counselor without having a huge bill to pay! – btw, we’re not counselors, just a married Christian couple who have moved from being in complete crisis to being restored). Christian wives got validated and Christian husbands learned how to listen to their wife’s heart and meet her needs. We just love when this happens!

During the course of the conversation, Michael and I will often jump in when there’s a lapse between couples and so last night I began speaking about the fact that I couldn’t really remember the last time Michael and I had argued – actually, I had thought that it was around Christmas time. This is a huge difference from when we were in our bad days and we used to fight and argue more than once a week. Ick!

So, this morning we were speaking to one of the guys who helps out in the ministry with his wife and he brought up when I’d said this last night and then reminded me that it had been more recent then Christmas because Michael and I had been on the phone with him and his wife to get their help on working through the issue that had come up for us – and it was a big one now that I think about it.

Here’s the awesome thing though; Michael is doing such a great job at being Christ like in initiating healing and moving towards me emotionally and physically when we do have an argument, that this amazing thing happens – closure! Once there’s closure, it’s completely possible and natural to forget about a situation that you’ve struggled through or been hurt by. Remember when I mentioned that the last thing we’d argued about was a big deal? It was! But because there was closure involved, we’ve both been able to move forward and not let that dissention follow along for the ride.

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