(from Annalea) Michael and I were talking about Christian marriages over the weekend and there's something we've been noticing lately that's becoming really apparent when we talk to other couples and hear their stories. Not surprisingly enough, it's pretty much across the board in these marriages ~ it certainly was in ours ~ and is linked to lack...
within the church. Namely:
no lack of the church expecting a wife to be Christlike toward her husband
and a complete lack in the church of expecting a husband to be Christlike toward his wife
Why is this? When did it become acceptable for the bride to pursue the groom? I certainly never heard the story where Cinderella searches out Prince Charming to see if the slipper fits. Doesn't make sense does it? It shouldn't; yet this is the underlying message that gets told over and over again. The result? A lack of husbands who are mature godly men because they don't have a church calling them into accountability when it comes to loving their wives as the Lord calls them to.
(from Michael) This seems to be fueled by an unspoken belief among Christian men that they can't love their wives as Christ loves us, so why even bother? And if a husband's trying isn't that good enough and shouldn't she be meeting him half way? These begin to become excuses for a husband not to obey God or to justify his disobedience. It's practically considered scandalous for someone to point to Eph 5:25 and suggest that a Christian husband actually
behave like a Christian husband.
Hard to do? At times, yes. But Jesus doesn't ask us to do anything to make us suffer; that's a narrow-minded view of Christianity. Any suffering in our walk with Christ is only temporary and is part and parcel of the sanctification process that always leads to blessings and glory in Christ. Anyway, most of our suffering is either a consequence of the choices we make or a result of something in our lives that needs to be whittled away.
There should never be a lack in the church when it comes to Christian marriage. Just revisit all the verses in the bible pertaining to marriage, the emphasis is on a Christian husband and Christian wife being mutually submitted to God and to one another; there's no 50/50. There's simply an "all in" relationship between the two which leaves neither one of them lacking. Isn't that what Jesus gives to us? Remember, He wants us to be one with Him as He is with the Father and Christian marriage has always been designed by God to reflect His nature...which never lacks.
